Galloping through an open field feeling a sense of freedom is something that I have always longed to do, yet paralyzing riding fear had imprisoned me.

A Gift of Freedom

By Jennifer Klitzke

My Tennessee walking horse mare was a Valentine’s Day gift from my husband in 2007. (Well, actually, I pleaded with him for two weeks when he buckled on Valentine’s Day and said, “Okay!”) She came with the registered name “Gift of Freedom” which is ironically symbolic. You’ll know what I mean in a moment.

As a child, I rode my spring-loaded plastic pony through the wild, wild West of my imagination. We galloped through the open plains joyful and carefree.

I dreamed for the day of owning a horse. Then 24 years later a friend said to me, “Jennifer, you’re going say ‘Someday I’ll buy a horse’ for the rest of your life. You need to do it or your ‘someday’ will never come.”

She was right, so that’s what I did. I saved enough money for my first horse and decades later, I think I’m more horse-crazy than ever! Bringing horses into my life was one of the best decisions I have ever made.

I was born for this.

Horseman Buck Brannaman says, “Horses are a mirror to your soul,” and I’ve found that to be true. I believe that God has used horses to expose the broken and misguided pieces of my life. Once I courageously acknowledge my need for healing and work through these broken areas, God has blessed me with a gift of freedom.

In fact, my first gift of freedom came around Easter 1996.

Leading up to this, horses had become a god of sorts. Horses were my source of life, my source of purpose, and my source of identity. Anytime horses fell short of the god-role I had placed them in, I became more demanding, and perfectionism replaced what once had been a harmonious partnership.

Then whenever my horse did anything where I felt out of control, hyper-ventilating panic attacks consumed me. I became so imprisoned in paralyzing fear that I only felt safe riding on a 10-meter circle, traveling to the left, on a calm day, with no distractions, in an indoor arena, at a slow walk.

Then one day I faced a crossroads: Either quit riding horses, what I was born for, or face the fear in humility, with courage and an open mind in hopes of overcoming it.

Yes, Brannaman’s words ring true, “Horses are a mirror to your soul.”

I am thankful that horses humbled me to realize they were not meant to be my source of life, God is.

Horses are a gift from God—not a god. I believe God allowed my crossroads experience to ultimately find what I had been searching for— an identity, a purpose, and meaning for life, which I found in Jesus Christ, “the Way, the Truth, and the Life, and the only way to the Father.”

Not only that, but God has also given me the courage to face my fears and overcome them. Through dialogues of prayer and perseverance, God has given me a gift of freedom to do what I never imagined I would be doing with horses.

Today, I am enjoying many adventures I only dreamed of doing with my naturally gaited Tennessee walking horse, Gift of Freedom. We are riding in the beauty of nature outside the four walls of an arena, participating in endurance rides, moving cows in sorting leagues, gymnastic jumping, and more.  All without the straps of fear.

I’ve learned riding horses isn’t about controlling them when I am afraid. It is about humbly seeking God for strength, receiving His grace to persevere, learning to become a relaxed and confident leader with my horse, and building a trusted partnership.

Enjoy your journey!

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